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How to Include Your In-Laws in Your Wedding Planning Process

You can't force a relationship, but you can open the door for a road of lifetime respect by how you handle your wedding planning. Incorporating your in-laws into your wedding can be a beautiful way to celebrate the merging of families and to show respect and appreciation for the important role they play in your lives. Here are 10 tips on how to Include Your In-Laws in Your Wedding Planning Process:


1. Open Communication:

Start by having an open and honest conversation with your partner about your desires and expectations regarding the involvement of your respective families in the wedding planning process. Make sure you're both on the same page and willing to compromise if necessary. Are you interested in having them participate in your ceremony What about grandparents as well?


2. Include Them in the Planning:

Here's a simple one- Simply put, why not include your In-Laws in your wedding planning process?! Invite your in-laws to participate in certain aspects of the wedding planning, such as choosing the venue, selecting the menu, selecting room blocks, tasting cake, or helping with decorations. This not only makes them feel valued but also allows them to contribute their ideas and expertise.. and maybe some monetary help :)


3. Special Roles:

Consider giving your in-laws special roles in the wedding ceremony or reception. For example, they could do a reading during the ceremony, give a toast at the rehearsal, or reception, or participate in a family unity ritual, such as a sand ceremony or candle lighting. You can also ask them to help with the day-of duties. Bringing food, snacks, water, and invite them to get ready with you, if you feel inclined.


4. Family Traditions:

Embrace any meaningful family traditions or customs that your in-laws may have and incorporate them into your wedding celebration. This could include cultural rituals, religious ceremonies, or even simple traditions like a family dance or a special blessing.


5. Quality Time:

Plan some quality time with your in-laws leading up to the wedding day. Whether it's a family dinner, a weekend getaway, or a joint activity, getting your nails done, spending time together can strengthen your bond and create lasting memories. Ask to get a day to go shopping, have brunch, and get massages. Or plan a fishing trip, boat ride, see a movie, or perhaps participate in some sporting activity, like pickle-ball or golfing. Naturally, as you spend time together you will be able to incorporate the future in-laws into your wedding plans.


6. Gifts and Gestures:

Show your appreciation for your in-laws with thoughtful gifts or gestures. This could be as simple as writing them a heartfelt thank-you note or giving them a meaningful keepsake to commemorate the occasion. Gift giving makes great photos! That leads us into the next one:


7. Photographs and Tributes:

Make sure to include your in-laws in your wedding photographs and tributes. Capture special moments with them throughout the day and include them in any speeches or slideshows to highlight their importance in your lives.


8. Respect Boundaries:

While it's important to involve your in-laws, it's also crucial to respect their boundaries and preferences. Be mindful of their comfort levels and don't pressure them into participating in activities they're not comfortable with.


9. Coordinate with Your Partner:

Keep the lines of communication open with your partner throughout the process. Make decisions together and support each other in navigating any potential challenges or conflicts that may arise with your families like room blocks, rehearsal dinner times, and inviting them to engagement parties or bridal showers.


10. Express Gratitude:

Finally, remember to express your gratitude to your in-laws for their love, support, and involvement in your wedding. Let them know how much their presence means to you and how grateful you are to have them as part of your extended family.



There's no getting around it, friend. Incorporating your in-laws into your wedding can create meaningful moments and strengthen your relationships as you embark on this new chapter of your lives together! They are going to be there for a very long time, and leaving the impression that you are humble, kind, accepting, and friendly will go so far. By involving them in the planning process, honoring their traditions, and showing appreciation for their presence, you can make them feel truly valued and cherished on your special day.


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